Hot Wings and Kitty Litter

My daughter loves the fried chicken nuggets in a spicey sauce from a local Chinese-American restaurant. Amazingly, sometimes it is the only thing she can keep down due to her current health challenges.
When visiting her and her wonderful family, and finding out tidbits like that, as well as that her nineteen-month-old son has a large vocabulary and knows many gestures of sign language she has taught him, and that her remarkable husband is installing solar panels as well as digging water lines for their home, I was humbled. Then a larger sense surrounded me: I was part of their family. I helped feed my two grandsons, herded the dogs, weeded sagebrush and nasty pokie weeds to clear space for a garden, fed the goats, and then chased her two sons while their parents did household and farm tasks.

Family, belonging, meaning.


That sense of peace and belonging enveloping me felt lovely. Even as I have my own fulfilling life, it is much more solo and four hundred miles away from them. That sense was a pleasant surprise. To be part of their small community, not an external visitor. Ah, finding the right words to express this now.

Yes, my poppies are blooming. As are my foxgloves and the myriads of daisies. I write this while listening to David Garrett’s spectrum of musical expertise on his violin. Commitment, talent, meaning.

It was not only when hot wings had climbed to the top of the priority list of urgent things to retrieve, they were about to be out of cat litter. With four cats, that is a definite imperative.

So off drove my son-in-law on the forty-minute drive to town to get both the mandated items. As I dug up more weeds and kept an eye on the boys, ages four and a half and one and a half, as they filled buckets with dirt, dumped them out, and ran through it, I had to smile as I thought of my own priorities. Cat litter was in the mix as well, yet this being with my family was now it. They wanted my help. I loved doing it. I rescheduled my trip to France to be here, happily. Priorities, commitment, love.

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O la la, yes, Paris is fabulous.

Venus de Milo at the Louvre. I look forward to the next trip. Sitting at a bistro and watching the people, seeing the cars, taxis, & busses swoosh by, hearing the voices of people talking as they jaunt along the sidewalks, zooming along when riding in the Metro, eating a caramel crepe on the Eiffel Tower!
Breathing in and being in the ambiance of Paris.

When they were building the Glass Pyramid at the Louvre in late 1980’s, which is now the entrance to the spectacular museum, they discovered during the excavations there were ramparts and streets below the ground. Which according to our tour guide, that no one prior to the excavations had any knowledge that the ramparts were there and had been for centuries. The Louvre was built as part of a palace and fortress in the 12th century.

Safety, history, legacy.



From Paris, I will then take the train out to Langres, about a three hour, scenic ride through farmland, villages and the countryside. Langres is another ancient city, dating back to the 3rd century.

Much of my family history is there. And family. Getting to know and build relationships with my cousins who live in and around Langres is a joy and a wonder.
Cousins, walking the ramparts, seeing and being where my great-great grandparents lived.

Family, belonging, history.

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Peace, love, and light to you.

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Text and photos (c) copyright Mary Dessein

Sea shells via intuition

We had been at the off-leash dog park, my rambunctious pup and I. He’d had a good series of gallops, so I was feeling guilt-free that I had a bunch of quiet time, for him, of online tasks to do when we got home and practice for the open mic I planned on going to.
As I crested the top of the dramatic Keystone Hill Road and headed down the 11% grade, I could see the beach in the distance ahead of me. Ah, a walk on the beach, pick up some more white rocks for my garden bed, and listen to the waves swooshing in.
Nope, my do-it brain said, I had things to do. Yet a calling inside me beckoned: it is early yet, the beach is right here, Pup is happy now. Go to the beach.
So I did.
The tide was in, which left a narrow path of beach rocks between the wall of driftwood and the incoming waves. Within a few steps along the beach, I saw a long-lived sea shell there among the rocks and picked it up. What a gift!

Finding sea shells was always special when I was a kid with my folks and my Grandmere as we walked the Mukilteo or Kalaloch Beach.

What stories could this shell tell? It had clearly been up down, and all around for quite some time.

Recently, I heard Karl Olsen of the Trinity Lutheran Church in Freeland sing “Christmas in the Trenches.” Went right into my heart. His excellent voice and rendition of this song, written by John McCutcheon. An event on Christmas, 1914 that I believe we need to remember and explore. To hear John talk about it a bit then sing it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cIxqJlnH2m8

My grandfather was stationed in eastern France during World War I, which is part of the impetus for the novel I am currently working on. His being there is how this part of my family got here, how where I am and who I am came to be. Oh, to talk with him now.

Walking along the beach, the waves washing up over my boots a few times as I reach down for those white rocks calling to me. I find another shell! How cool is that? Enjoying the walk as I balance myself on the unsteady rocks, hear the waves swish up to me, and keep seeing ‘one more’ white rock in front of me. Then I spot another shell! Woo-hoo! What a remarkable day this is.

Seems about time to head back to the car. I am nearing the logs and driftwood to climb over and there is a fourth shell! Indeed, this is a day to be remembered! Hi Mom. Hi Grandpa! Hi Grandmere (my mom’s mother)!

Indeed, I hold these shells wondering where they’ve been, what beaches have they seen and washed up upon, what creatures and how many lived in them. And what they would tell me if they could.

How fortunate that I listened to my inner voice. I am blessed indeed.
A wondrous, health-filled 2024 to you. Thank you for reading.

Does it matter?

Most of us have heard the proverbial phrase, “We stand on the shoulders of those who came before us.” Which I take to mean that those who came before us, teachers, parents, ancestors, historical figures, learned and discovered multitudes of things that help us move forward. We don’t have to re-invent the wheel, as is also said.

Meeting my cousins recently, separated by a couple generations and a few thousand miles, has continued to resonate within me. Does meeting them matter? Absolutely. Not only are they wonderful people, they are family. How does it matter? That I am still pondering about. When will I see them again? Will my children and grandchildren meet them? Qui sait?

Charles Dessein

My mother’s grandfather was Charles Dessein. I had no idea who his parents were, nor did I give it any thought until I was at the family crypt near Langres recently. His parents were my great-great grandfather, Alexander Dessein and great-great grandmother, Marie Billant. How does that matter now? Obviously, I would not be here without them, nor would a lot of other people! Do I stand on their shoulders?

famille crypt

What legacy, shoulders to stand on, do I leave for my grandchildren? For great-grandchildren I may or may not be here to meet?

Maybe this is as much or more about being present in the moment, being conscious of my choices, being aware of what I have learned in the last twenty years so I can make wiser choices now.

Chia seeds are reportedly healthy for you on many levels. I made some pumpkin chia pudding this afternoon. Sounds a little dicey to you? I’ll try it and let you know. Pondering takes nourishment.

Thanks for reading!

So … where is Home?

Bon jour.
Having traveled a bit over the years, lived a few months in Italy in my early twenties, and lived most of my life in the Pacific Northwest, it is an interesting question for me now. Where is home? My adult children have lives and families far from me. I live in a comfortable home with a nice view. Is this my forever home? A new thought for me.

My recent trip to France was wondrous in every way. Paris is beautiful, historic and has endless things to do. Including sitting at an outside bistro enjoying watching the world of people bustling past, cars, and busses on their journeys. The Louvre, the metro, the Orsay, the Eiffel Tower, the crepes!

This cruise on the Seine river was fantastic. Another opportuinity for me to learn to be present and not rant about the unexpected obstacles. We got lost in Paris, missed our connection to enter the Eiffel Tower, and so were a couple hours late. If we had not been late, we would have completed our Seine cruise during the afternoon and missed the stunning sunset on the river.

The Apollo Gallery at the Louvre. Oh yeah, pretty impressive. It was the model for the Hall of Mirrors at Versailles, which was completed in 1684. Versailles and the Louvre have been home for scads of people over the centuries. Things are still being discovered. Walls of the original medieval fortress were found under the Louvre as they excavated for the glass Pyramid in 1985.

Have you ever, or how many times, have you asked Where is my home? Is where I am now my forever home?

In Langres, the ancient town of my maternal ancestors, the question arose for me in a new and vibrant way. I re-connected with all four of my third cousins, and their families, after twenty-five years. Third cousins as our grandmothers were sisters. Rich, wonderful experience. Their children and grand-children are my fourth and fifth cousins! Yes, it matters. Family matters. Finding where we belong matters. Right?

Here is my new favorite refrigerator magnet: my four cousins and I at the Langres train station as I head back to Paris.

Am I going back to Langres? You bet!
Am I finishing my novel set in Langres? Oh yeah! Watch for it to be out early next year~

Thank you for reading my blog.
Merci d’avoir lu mon blog.